Have you ever struggled with overwhelming feelings of guilt? There may be more to this emotion than meets the eye.
Sometimes, guilt is actually a manifestation of repressed anger – anger that we couldn’t afford to express, especially in our formative years.
Think back to your childhood. If you experienced mistreatment or abuse from a primary caregiver, your natural response may have been to feel angry at that person. But as a child, you were utterly dependent on that caregiver for your survival and wellbeing. Expressing that anger directly was simply not an option.
So instead, the anger got pushed down, shoved aside. But it didn’t disappear. Instead, it got redirected inwards. Rather than thinking “you hurt me,” the child learns to think “it’s my fault, I deserve this.”
The caregiver’s status as good and benevolent is protected, and the child can restore a sense of safety. But the cost is significant – the child also learns to habitually turn their anger inwards, and guilt becomes the default emotional response.
This dynamic can become deeply ingrained, carried forward into adulthood. The guilt persists, but its origins in repressed childhood anger often remain unexamined.
Becoming aware of this pattern is the first step. With self-compassion and the help of a therapist, the suppressed anger can be gradually brought to the surface and released. This allows the guilt to dissipate, replaced by a truer, more empowered sense of self.
If you struggle with guilt, know that there may be more to the story. Exploring the roots of this emotion could be a profoundly healing journey.